Dream of Talking to the Dead
One night, three months after my husband died, I had a dream so vivid that I have never known anything like it before or since. It was a terrible time in my life and the dream was obviously connected with his death, but although the dream was many years ago I have never forgotten a single detail of it and would love to know what you make of it.
I was with my husband, walking outside in a place I did not know. There was a white New England-style wicket fence on one side of us. In the dream, I knew he was dead but felt totally accepting of the fact that he was walking with me.
We were very happy to be together and we talked a lot, though when I woke, I had no memory of what we said.
Bizarrely, at one point we ended up in a garden where there was a long washing line, from which beautiful candle-type lights were hanging. I was puzzled by this when I woke up, but not at all puzzled in the dream.
In the last part of the dream my husband told me he had to go. All of a sudden two friends of his stepped forward (one well known to me, and still alive in this world). My husband was then lying down on a bed, still wearing the much-loved coat in which he had first appeared in the dream, but his face had turned an unhealthy grey colour. He took my hand and told me again that he couldn’t stay any longer. With that, I woke up.
CRAIG’S REPLY: Dreams often deal with issues that we prefer not to think about in waking life such as death and our own mortality. For many people the angst of bereavement expresses itself in dreams and this emotional release helps them to return to inner harmony. Often a dream about actually being dead is a symbol for an overwhelming emotional problem. Sometimes these dreams can occur during a bereavement. In some instances we Spiritualists believe that dreams may be a direct connection with the spirit world.
In most cases, Spiritualists and people who have had some proof of life after death from a medium, are more sanguine about death and dying. Your dream is about making the transition to the next world. The white fence is a symbol of the division between this world and the next. You walk together and you are totally accepting of the reality that it is possible to speak with the spirit of your husband through a dream. You are happy and recall the feeling when you awake but not the words that were said. Studies have shown that words are the first thing we forget when waking from a dream so it is a good idea to keep a dream diary and write these down.
The garden is a symbol for paradise – a word used for the afterlife that comes from the Persian for ‘walled garden’. The washing line symbolises cleansing and the healing of the spirit after death. In this case the healing is done with light – represented by the candles.
Much of the dream deals with your own feeling about the process of death. You worry about others dying when you see your husband’s friends. Seeing him lying down in bed is a symbol for the process of death and the overcoat represents the physical body that we remove at death.
Seeing his grey face reminds you of the painful memory of seeing him dead but you are reassured, as his spirit takes your hand, that life is eternal.